Dear Other Night Night

Dear Other Night Night,

I didn't know how much I need you. I really had no idea how I depend on you. The depth of my love for you was completely unknown until I lost an entire night of sleep from sobbing over you.
You were a gift for my boy before he was born so we've had you all 4.5 years of his life. Early on, I forced you into his hands and hoped he'd love you. I thought we could have a handful of night nights and swap them out for even wear. I was so wrong. When Parker was little, he wanted all the little loveys. He named them white night night, blue night night, mommy night night, taggy night night and OTHER night night. You, other night night, were the quick favorite. Parker could always find you amongst the others even in the darkness of his crib. I still remember the day I realized he'd named you "night night"...it was because I always scooped him up, handed him a paci and a lovey and said "let's go night night". He associates you with sleep and so you were named.
You've been through all of life with us. You are the item I stuffed between myself and my boy while I rocked, whispered prayers, sang songs and begged for sleepiness. You were the item I handed my boy when he cried from teething, fevers, and having to give up his paci. You've been on road trips and airplanes. You survived the challenge of 365daysofsweetparkersleep photos. You've transitioned from crib to big boy bed. You've moved from Cypress to San Antonio and back to Cypress. You are with him when I cannot be. You are the last thing I hand him before I kiss him goodnight, the thing he holds onto while he grows each night and the first thing he reaches for when he wakes each morning. Even now, he carries you downstairs and you snuggle between us each morning as we watch a show. You're moved to the kitchen bar for breakfast and sometimes remain there until nap time or even the end of the day. I love that you're nearby, always on call in case a little boy needs you closer.
A few years ago, you were accidentally left at Cookie and Chief's and only after Cookie popped you in the mail did I realize how risky a process that actually was. Sometimes Parker plays with you and at bedtime we have a hard time finding you. Daniel and I breathe a sigh of relief when we're able to place you in our boy's hands and send him off to sleep. A few times, I've talked to Parker about how special you are and remind him that there's only one of you. Because you're so special, we've opted to leave you at home while on a few trips. After last night, I'm afraid you may not be traveling anymore.
Wednesday, we loaded up the car and headed to San Antonio. Of course you were in my big boy's seat with him the entirety of the trip. You spent two nights in bed with him at the Hyatt Regency Hill Country Resort & Spa. Ya'll slept with Daddy and snuggled sweetly while I wrestled a little brother and his cough induced sleeplessness. Uncle Euell died and we needed to get in the car and make our 6 hour drive to see our family in east Texas. Daddy and Parker loaded the car with out Pierce and me. I remember gathering all the blankets, dogs and loveys and stuffing them in the pillow case that Parker would carry to the car. I swore I packed you. But at the end of a long day, when it was time for bed, you were nowhere to be found. We looked in the car, every single bag, my purse...and nothing. We called the hotel, McDonald's (the only stop we made) and the funeral home. No one had seen you. I thought you were on the floorboard and that I'd asked Parker to carry all his stuff inside Baba's house. I thought I'd done a good job of making sure we had all the things we needed. Parker's face was one of agony and he sobbed himself to sleep without you. I prepared him for loss and for never seeing you again. And when I lay myself down to sleep, I was wracked with guilt and heartache. All the feelings in the world were projected onto you, night night. I prayed and prayed you'd be found and finally was able to snooze for a few hours only to awaken before the sun rose to sob some more. You see, I'm not ready to lose you, night night. I'm in love with the way you comfort my boy. I love seeing his little hands wrap around you and snuggle you up to his face as he settles in for sweet sleep. I love that I find you in random places around the house because you've taken part in that morning's wildly imaginative hog hunting trip or police chase adventure. You are the link to my baby boy, my toddler and my little boy...and I'm just not ready to let go.
Love,
Mama

*Thankfully, as we furiously packed again the next day, my husband thought to search my cousin's room and night night was found and rescued. We were separated for just 24 hours but oh how sweet the reunion!

2015 | August 16-31

16. 
Around the house. We're beating the heat by staying IN.
17. 
Work from home life. Sitting in the kitchen while the boys play.
18. 
The first few minutes of Pierce's nap, I've been intentionally spending time with Parker. We've played games and done crafts -- anything to keep the tv off and really share some quality time together. I love the things he says!

No excuses - working out even with the boys up and playing all around me.
19. Swim lessons were cancelled this morning, so at the last minute we threw our clothes in a bag and jumped in the car for a quick trip to East TX. Today is Emily's Heaven day and we just knew it'd make everyone's hearts feel a little better to see these two sweet boys.


The boys did great in the car. We rolled in to Pineland a little after 1:30pm. Shannion wasn't at school, but we did find her nearby and went back to school with her. The boys loved exploring her classroom and raaaawr-ing at the tigers. Baba came by the school and we all went to eat at the local mexican food joint before going back to Baba's to see Hannah Banana.

My fave "cemetery drink" as Parker calls it and oh my was Pierce a little worn out!

A milestone. Pack n play is at moms so when we decided to jump in the car for a surprise road trip I grabbed the "boat bed" for Pierce knowing Parker could sleep In a big bed. I laid him down and his eyes got big. Then he pointed to my face and said "eyes, nose" behind that paci. Not wanting to sit in here with him until he fell asleep, I turned out the light and walked out. He cried for 1 minute. An hour later I come to bed and see this bigness.
20. 


A visit to the farm house  - they love cows, dogs and tractors. 



A quick visit to see Uncle Wink. He lets us ride in the tractor! Parker always enjoys this. 

Oh, Emily...how my boys would love to have met you on this side of Heaven. 

This awesome coach, Jen, earned us a call with CEO Carl Daikeler. It was so fun to hear his encouraging message and get some face time with my sweet friend. She's really rocking her Beachbody business and I'm so excited for her.

...while I was gone.
21. 
Morning snuggles and sweetness.
22. 
This never gets old. I find face after face of this cutie on my phone. Lots of deleting but I do manage to save a few.

Papa and Grana came by to take Parker out for a special shopping trip and lunch date. He loved the alone time with them and even came home with a few things for his brother. Thanks Papa and Grana for the sweet treat.

"Sams" is SIX. We drove to Nav to celebrate his birthday and had a great visit with his family. These boys are always fast friends when they're together. Brandi and I love that there's 1.5 years between them, but they're almost always the same size.
23. 
Little brother wasn't quite ready for this morning's wake up call.

Hilariously, Parker accidentally dressed in Pierce's 18mos shorts! We all got a good laugh out of this.

Coke floats. On a park bench. Facing west. Across the street from my house. Oh how blessed we are.

24. 

It's the first day of school for our people. We're hanging out at home. Sure are going to miss you, Summer. It's been so much fun. 
And to think, a year from now I have to let this big boy of mine go off to school. As tough as togetherness sometimes is, I cannot imagine my day without him. Fall of 2016 please come slowly.

My very own Elmer Fudd.

Homemade, healthy pizza. We all loved it! 

Pierce made me teary eyed as we "rock a bye babied" tonight. He's such a big little boy and not so much a baby. Breaks my heart how quickly we all grow up. 
25. 
This boy is my greatest love and my greatest challenge and my greatest accomplishment all rolled into one. 
26. 
Eating and crafting -- their faves.

A visit with our Ellie Paige while her Mommy and Daddy checked on little brother.

I got in the pool. With 3 kids and a dog. It went pretty well. Everyone is still breathing. I did confirm that Pierce cannot yet float or swim. Parker is a rock star. Moxie dog loves to chase water sprayed by kiddos and Ellie Paige loves her floaties and sitting on the side and playing with her "brudder". Sweet afternoon with these littles.
27. 
Meet the teacher for my sweet boys. I think they'll both really LOVE school this year. I'm so excited about their new school and cannot express enough gratitude to the Lord for the reminder that He always wants the best for us and will provide it...we need only to listen and follow in obedience. 

Hungriest person I've ever met. He's almost always under foot, begging for a snack! 
28. 

All too soon he will be the size of mama. For now, I soak up my mornings with some big boy snuggles before we get our wild little mister out of bed. Love this short and sweet time we have together.

Entertaining himself before his swim lesson. 

Parker is doing an amazing job at becoming an even better swimmer. 

The family that works out together...ha! My workouts don't always feel 100% with little people around, but I do love that boy boys are enthusiastic about fitness and want to join me when they see me working out. 

My whole heart, driving away from me. They're off for a fun night at Cookie's house. I'm always torn between tears and throwing a party. Mom problems for sure!
29. 
I haven't been able to find my mail key  -- maybe this is why! 
Also, we have mice in our back yard and I just cannot even go out there without being completely creeped out. 
30. 
Coffee in bed. Worship music. Shakeo for breakfast. Headed to get our boys

Parker is the weirdest sleeper - he loves to cover his head with his snuggles. Meanwhile, I'm sweating to death over here. 

Brother snuggles. Wanted or not. 

How I love these monster boys. 

And because I have to document it -- Pierce went pee pee in the potty for the first time tonight! It's a start. Woohoo. 

31. 

Blowing kisses to Baba as we hang up the phone, appreciating mama's cooking and getting some stretches in. Life sure isn't boring. 

College care packages sure are fun to send! 

These two belong together. It's not vanilla bean, but it'll do until VB is on the shelves. 2015 summer lesson -- not all vanillas are created equal. 

2015 | August 1-15

1. So yesterday and all of this morning was awful as I battled a terrible, no good virus. I haven't been sick like this is so so long. And TMI, but after two babies, when I throw up, it's best that I just sit on the toilet. At one point I even laid down in the bathtub and then just bathed myself over and over. So gross. I can't stand being sick. Daniel took great care of the boys and I barely heard a peep out of them all evening and night. I finally stopped being sick and was able to hi to a couple of sweet faces this morning before they met Mom at Bucee's. Daniel had a golf game and I just couldn't crawl out of bed so they're playing in Nav while I recover. This is when I'm more than thankful to live in close proximity to family. We have reinforcements. Woohoo!

When Pierce came into my room chugging a bottle I tried so hard not to laugh (it hurt!). He's never liked bottles and now at almost 18 mos old, he'll tip one back and drink it like it's his best friend.

There wasn't a pack n play at Mom's so Pierce had to make do and sleep in Bekah's bed.

2. Our boys are home again. I'm so thankful I was able to rest without having to care for anyone else.  This little boy who doesn't snuggle was pretty happy to cuddle up in his Daddy's lap.
3. Day 1 of swim lessons for the boys. I'm excited to see Pierce progress. Swimming lessons have been the best thing we possibly could have done for Parker. He's so confident in the water. Hopefully little brother will be just as good as he gets bigger. A neighbor in Towne Lake is allowing us to use her pool and it's so fun to watch all the kiddos play as they wait their turn for their lesson. We had an appointment for Parker's ears this afternoon and all looks good just one week post surgery. Woohoo! Even Pierce's hearing has improved some and in just one week he's learned a dozen or more words. I'm so proud of him.


5. We don't have preschool until the end of the month so mornings around here are pretty relaxed and we actually quite like it. Snuggling in bed while my boys watch a show makes my heart happy. Pierce is growing a little more affectionate and will sometimes sit closely with his brother.


Parker is so big and often shows his independency by offering to do things all on his own. He can get himself and his brother snacks and water but today I helped him make his own sandwich for the first time. He did a pretty great job!
6. Sunday, Rebekah sent the boys home with a few treats and Pierce wandered into the pantry, grabbed his Cheetos and plopped down to eat them. I crack up at this child who eats all day long. He never fills up and I do not understand how he can take another bite.



Family dinner date to Chuy's. We haven't eaten here since before we moved. It's a fave and we've missed it! Pierce didn't use a high chair. He sat with his Daddy or in a little booster seat next to me. To no surprise, he loves queso like the rest of us and ate it with his fingers.

I got away with just the big boy for a few minutes and we had some fun at Kroger. Parker loves to be in charge of something like my keys and thought it so funny when he learned he could snap them onto his cap so that he wouldn't lose them. Today he pushed the buggy, returned it, carried our groceries to the car all while having some big kid convo with Mom.  Now if I can just get him to watch where he's going and not wreck into anything or anyone.
7. Bek came over and played with the boys so Daniel and I snuck out for a quick movie date. We came home to Parker and Bekah playing "war" with a bucket of army men


8. Saturday morning lovies in Mom and Dad's bed. I love when we're all home together.  This afternoon, we jumped in the car and headed to Nav to celebrate Maddox's birthday. It was great to get to see Baba, Don, Dolores, Laura, Jarrod and Ella too. The kids had so much fun swimming and playing on the water slide. We had to deflate the thing to get them to change clothes and get in the car. After the party, we spent a little time at Cookie and Chief's to celebrate Chief's birthday.



11. Another week of swim lessons, but first some silly brother love. We're really seeing improvement in Parker's ability to kick and side swim. I'm so proud of him.


Pierce's favorite part of lessons is getting to play on this truck!

More "war" play on the bar. He's loving that he gets to do this all by himself.
Being back in Cypress means I get the be part of some the very best women's events with our incredible church. I was able to carpool with a new friend down to the loop and then got to sit next to this sweet face during Kelly Matte's lesson.


12. He's saying "cheeeeese". Sweet big baby man. We sang rock-a-bye-baby over and over tonight. And he was still. In my arms. Almost unheard of. I leaned over and whispered prayers over him into his ear and he giggled and giggled as if I were being so hilarious. Oh I'm so in love with this boy. 

13. These two boys love to be in the water.

Naps were boycotted today so we went with the flow and made other plans. Nothing brings me more happiness than seeing my boys snuggle and play together.

14. A great day at home until this afternoon --

Daniel noticed a man broken down on our loop this am around 6:30. When he got home 10 hrs later the man was still there. Daniel stopped to ask if he needed help since he had been in his hot car all day and then drove home to get him water and snacks. He drove him to autozone once or twice, bought him dinner and worked with him for hours on his car. Nothing. He brought Mr Donald home to our house and I met him at the door with a bleeding baby. Donald sat on our porch and charged his phone while we went to the er. He kept saying he had a buddy coming to get him. He was still here when we returned so we sat and talked to him for a little bit. Daniel offered to drive him to Heb on Barker/290 to meet his friend. When they got close, Daniel felt prompted to ask him if he really had someone coming to get him. No. It's been 16hrs or so and Donald had no one to come get him. Where are his people? Daniel drove him almost an hour home -- near Conroe/Magnolia somewhere. He gave him money and told him to call us if he needed anything. Donald delivers papers for the chronicle. He's worried about his car. I'm thankful my husband "shows God's love" by going out of his way for a complete stranger. Not the afternoon we could have expected so we pray God moves and works in these moments.

Quick ER trip this evening, but not for this guy. Parker was my big helper and calmly called his daddy to tell him we needed to go to the hospital. Zero freak out even when mama teared up and we saw brother's face bleeding. Way to be my big, brave boy Parker!

Oh beautiful boy, mama is so sorry. I should never have let you sit on the bed without me. Pierce was so big and cried for a couple of minutes and then was very still and calm. Once at the ER he wanted down to walk around. I told him he had an owie and he kept saying "owww" and grabbing his legs (shot site). Silly boy. Very proud of him for doing so well.

So this part was a little bit sad. They strapped him down in order to work on his sweet face. He cannot stand being taken away from mama or having people do stuff to him. We sang "Jesus loves me" while he screamed and cried and the wound was cleaned and glued. It wasn't as bad as it looked and thank goodness it didn't bleed much. Pierce just kept saying "all done all done all done".

Cheek glued. Ice cream cone. New pjs and diaper. Mama's milk. Bed time! 
16.
The morning after.

We certainly took it as easy as possible. Pierce is not our careful child and he fell on his face a number of times today. Each time I was so nervous I'd pick him up and his face would be split open again.


A few Parker pics. He loves to document our day and sometimes gets a few decent shots.

Pj day for all. Well deserved, I think.